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Have you tried opening a locked door by force? What happens? It breaks and the other side is left completely vulnerable. Anyone can walk in and do whatever they want. Now, suppose that door is someone’s boundaries and you kick them repeatedly! That’s the scenario when you are trying to help a rape survivor but don’t know how. So, it is very important to know how to help your loved one deal with the life-threatening trauma.
LISTEN: Just listen, don’t express your views in middle. Common statements such as what happened to leave it in the past or you are stronger than before or what can we do now; avoid them. It’s hard for them to visit those moments again as they are already living it every second. So, just listen without interrupting or judging.
UNDERSTANDING THE TRIGGERS: PTSD, depression and suicidal thoughts are the common psychological sufferings a person experiences after a sexual assault. So, it is very important to understand what triggers a person’s pain. It can be words or actions or any environment. So, try to provide them with a safe physical and emotional environment.
GIVE THEM THEIR SPACE: As explained above, a person develops multiple defence mechanisms and emotional layers after the trauma. Keep an eye on them while making sure as not to invade their privacy and space. It becomes very important to ensure that you respect the person’s physical and emotional boundaries.
BE PATIENT: Healing is a process and not an act. It can take from months to years to heal. You have to be patient and supportive. Let them open up at their own pace. Help them rediscover the world in a safe space. Watch their back as they get back to the real them.
GET THEM THE RIGHT HELP: A person needs proper physical and psychological treatment. Respect their choices for they might not be ready, but help them understand its importance. Pull them slowly while they can walk and help them get up and rest when they fall.
You can’t imagine or understand what a person feels when he/she goes through any trauma. But, you can respect their pain and empathize with them. Healing is a war but the peace after winning is beautiful.
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